Panelists at NewsX’s We Women Want Conclave challenged the traditional expectation that women must “just adjust” in marriage, stressing that equality, communication, timely counselling and individual identity are essential for healthy relationships. Emphasising the need for compromises from both sides, Rini Simon, a former Doordarshan anchor, argued that both partners must make adjustments. She added that placing the burden of such expectations disproportionately on women is a key reason behind growing marital discord and divorce. Simon believes that the solution lies in changing patterns at home, arguing that parents should focus on raising boys and girls with similar values and expectations.
The discussion, titled ‘Just Adjust: Advice to Brides’, also focused on the importance of addressing marital issues in a timely manner. Shivani Misri Sadhoo, a marriage counsellor, highlighted the importance of seeking professional help before marital problems become deeply entrenched. She said many couples hesitate to approach counsellors and “brush things under the rug” because of the stigma associated with therapy. Divorce lawyer Vandana Shah said that when she started her legal practice, she would witness around 20 divorce proceedings each day, now the number has gone up to 120 cases a day. However, she continued, the spike in numbers has not brought down the stigma associated with divorces. Shah believes that divorce is a non-negotiable option in two scenarios, when there is abuse or when losing one’s identity. The signs of a bad marriage are often visible very early, says wedding planner Minal Bhatnagar.
