Difference between parents and in-law homes

Having a blood relationship makes it easy for people to love one another. And this is particularly true of parents and children. Even if a child does not return his parents’ love back, he or she will continue to receive love.
But relations regarding one’s in-laws are totally different. A daughter-in-law lives with people to whom she is not related by blood. If, at her parent’s house, the culture was one of unconditioned love, the culture at her in-laws would be, ‘in giving we receive’.
This means — that if one is not prepared to give, one will not receive.
It is quite common for women to consider their parent’s home ideal, and their in-law’s home less than ideal. But the one who suffers as a result of this thinking is the woman herself. Due to this way of thinking, she fails to build a genuine relationship with her in-laws and her husband. God has created men and women with special, different capabilities so that they may play their respective roles effectively. But most women fail to play their roles, and thus leave their potential unutilized.
A joint effort is necessary in order to play any role in this world. A home is an institution where such effort is essential for its successful running. The people in the house should realize this, and make efforts accordingly.
This applies more particularly to the woman, as she is the foundation of a home.
And she can play her part effectively only when she considers her in-law’s home as her own.
But such a course of action can be followed only by those who regard their home as a social institution.

Late Maulana Wahiduddin Khan

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