Every year on Mother’s Day, social media is replete with posts and photographs declaring the love of mothers. But does that truly celebrate a day which identifies itself with something as large and beautiful as Mother’s Day? Or we have happily underestimated the potential of this occasion and washed off our hands by walking the easy way? Let’s explore.
Mother’s Day is the celebration of an emotion, a philosophy, a faith, that never gives up. It is a choice of unconditionality over vengeance, of care over judgements. For that we don’t necessarily have to nurture a baby in our wombs for nine months. Instead of looking at motherhood as a relationship, perhaps it is time we understand the term with a broader perspective. Let motherhood look beyond blood and genes, and stand for deep affection towards the world around. This would include tolerance towards people who differ from us in cultures, ideas, practices and occupations. This would include respecting people irrespective of their social or economic status. This would also mean protecting interests of those who are dependent on us or looking beyond our own selfish interests when we approach others.
This would require a few motherly qualities that we might specifically develop within ourselves. The basic idea is to make it comfortable for those who are spending time with us, so that they can come back to us with the trust that their emotions would never be misused or misinterpreted.
Patience: if we think of our mothers, the first quality that comes in mind is their patience with us. There are times when we are difficult and frustrated; we pour ourselves on our mothers, at times harshly. In life though, hardly we have the patience to understand that everything that people tell us are not meant from the heart. Misunderstandings affect all kinds of relationships.
Forgiveness: another mothering quality that gives us the cushion to get along after making mistakes. Mothers don’t forgive because they want to make a favour to their children. Rather, they forgive because it brings them peace. Forgiveness is one such quality which settles many psychological imbalances and replaces anger with indifference.
Mother’s Day is the celebration of an emotion, a philosophy, a faith, that never gives up. It is a choice of unconditionality over vengeance, of care over judgements. For that we don’t necessarily have to nurture a baby in our wombs for nine months. Instead of looking at motherhood as a relationship, perhaps it is time we understand the term with a broader perspective.
Emotional intelligence: this is about having a clear understanding about one’s emotions and those of others. An emotionally intelligent person can specifically identify his own feelings and emotions, and can merge them with those of others. Our mothers know instantly what we need, and what we are looking for. This comes with emotional awareness, when we are more open towards others and are observant. It helps in boosting the spirits of togetherness and coexistence.
Positivity: the world today is filled with lots of negativity. When there are no blasts or quakes or murders or rapes, we pick up issues that prompts us to take sides and approach them violently with our robust opinions. Increasingly we are giving up hope and empathy. A mother’s positivity is such that even in her ugly child, she finds beauty. That’s exactly what we need to pick up as a skill. In our relentless race to achieve better and run after targets, we miss out on the warmth that life bestows upon us without being asked. Consider identifying those.
Diplomacy and Transparency: while diplomacy helps in wording ourselves carefully and behaving in a manner that it hurts the least, transparency instils faith. We have to choose our situations accordingly. Mothers do it all the time. They are discrete and sensitive when they have to protect us; they are blunt and honest otherwise, irrespective of what the world opines. Both these qualities are instrumental in positioning a person, by adjusting with his strengths and weaknesses.
Next mother’s day, let’s try something new. Let’s explore the “mother” within each one of us, irrespective of whether we have given birth to a baby or not, and bless ourselves with a participative togetherness. Perhaps that would make the day a lot more meaningful and would be the best form of respect we might show towards our mothers.